They say greater age, brings greater responsibilities, and lately I’ve been feeling that ‘cliché’ line a bit too deep. Twenty three has come with quite ‘a package’ so to say. The pressure to get things done, the pressure to do it right, the pressure to not mess things up and do it to perfection. I mean, who’s perfect after all? But I wouldn’t mind if I was, at least I would have got everything right by now.
It’s on a Friday, around midnight when I thought of penning this down. I had retired to bed quite early after a long day but a phone call woke me up.
“Hey Tal, how are you? “
“I’…m go..o..d.” I replied, trying hard to be lively.
“You’re asleep at this time on a Friday night?”
“ooh well! I’m just tired, it has been a long day.”
“Up for a glass of wine or two with some good music? -there’s this live band at Al- chemist”
“Thank you for the invite, but I can’t really make it today,” I said, trying to come up with a perfect excuse.
“Come on! It’s just an hour or so, I don’t like how distant you are from your friends nowadays.”
“I promise I’ll find time to catch up soon,” sounding rather concerned.
“Ummh, it’s cool, till then, cheers!”
Well, the disappointment in that statement was quite evident but honestly I had no reasons to go out and catch up with friends or celebrate when I already have a lot on my plate.
Maybe, before the eyes of the society, you only live once, you live while you’re young, and you’re not supposed to be indoors on a weekend. That’s the only struggle you should be dealing with as a twenty-something year old. But honestly, that wasn’t my concerns right now. ‘Adulting’ maybe?
I had also planned to go zip lining at The Forest because somehow, I thought that’s the only place that could relate to every transition that was going on with me. The fear and uncertainties before getting on the zip line, the freedom and feeling of satisfaction once you take off and the urge to do it over and over again once you’re done. How relatable!
The next morning, on my way there, courtesy of big foot adventures, I had a lot on my mind. I’m I really going to do this, what if that zip line gets stuck in the middle of nowhere and what if it unclips?
On the other hand, I also thought, what if I just tried?
The funny thing was that, out of over fifty people, the guy clipping us onto the zip line noticed how scared I was and called me to go first. Man! Didn’t I have a lot to prove!
As I climbed up, I thought to myself, yes this is the time. FACE IT!
One, two….go! And suddenly, all my fears disappeared and I felt some great levels of freedom that I could use to take over the world. What seemed too difficult turned out to be the easiest. The adrenaline rush felt so good. Why was I even afraid of this? The fear of unknown maybe? That holds us back even before trying out anything. As I heard the instructor say, ‘BREAK.’ I was super proud of myself.
I DID IT!
I left that place a different person. I understood it was okay to feel the pressure to put my life in order. It was okay to feel uncertain and confused about things. But once you’re set to face it, you can take over the world.
I’m now learning to face it instead of running away from it.
Tell me, are you sometimes under pressure to do everything at once? How do you deal with it?
Thank you so much for stopping by.
Courtesy of BigFoot Adventures.